Being Hunted.

I find that if I spend a few hours on the dating site at various times of the day, I attract the attention of a steady stream of women.

Plenty Of Fish displays your profile when you are on line so people have a chance of seeing it by merely being logged on themselves. I would guess that quite a lot of people are fairly poor at doing searches so these opportunities for your profile to appear are very important if you want results. Obviously you need to have a good profile. Fortunately I get quite a lot of compliments on mine and I can assure you I am by no means an especially good looking fit guy.

Getting attention is clearly key to opening up a conversation with women looking to date, but it also brings challenges. Having around one woman a day approaching you is wonderful but it does mean you have problems juggling them all unless you are ruthless and openly reject all the women whose picture you don't automatically really like. Even then if you were to be ruthless in this way, you can easily find you are missing out on some lovely ladies. Remember people know people and a referred date or someone you met on a date with someone else is just as good as someone that came direct, especially if you end up marrying them !

Women have a harder time because they get a lot more approaches from men. Fortunately the standard of the average male profile is poor, the average male approach is terrible and a lot of men do not have much of a clue how to open a dialogue with a woman and make them feel comfortable. In other words, it is easy to get approaches if you tune in to what women want, and that may take some personal development on your part too..

People really do look a lot different in real life, and women often take really poor photographs of themselves or have few good ones to use on profiles. Photos distort features especially when taken with web cams, phones and by the subject themselves. Many women under sell themselves too. When you have met very attractive women whose profile pictures made you feel so so about them, you are less likely to want to reject others that don't look great on screen.

When you have several ladies approaching you and you are getting replies from those you have also approached, it can be a little over whelming. if you haven't discussed being exclusive with people assume they are free to date but you will also want to judge how you feel you should respond as a relationship develops. You don't really want to be cutting people off just because you have had a few dates with someone but you may want to slow things down with certain others whilst you give an existing date a good go. This juggling is probably the hardest part of the on line dating process to manage but learn to be good at it and remain sensitive to peoples levels of insecurity.

Key to this is your personal integrity and the way you convey yourself. Someone who brags about other women or has 000's of contacts on Facebook, talks about their line of conquests or is otherwise less than intelligent about what they say to women they may end up dating, is not doing themselves any favours. It is about them .. not you.

It is OK to let people know you are dating and talking to others, and this in itself can increase interest (as we know a lot of women like competition too and if you are good enough for others they may well want you more)but be careful.

Date one at a time (ideally) but let your dates know that you are talking to other people but that you are looking for a long term relationship. Be cool about women coming and going too, interest levels evolving etc. Be cool about your dating interests talking to other guys, indeed encourage it, perhaps along the lines of them needing to get some experience because you don't want them to feel they missed out on something when they fall in love with you after the first date ( :D )

You are a good catch and as such you trust them to know that even when they are meeting other guys. You don't need to be possessive but women do want to feel special and wanted, and of course they are because you are serious about dating them. Keep one eye on the reality that there is some showmanship and a cultural expectation of a chase, courtship, flirting and romance to go through here !

People get many a date from someone they previously thought was a dead and buried prospect, because they were nice,understanding of the challenges of on line dating, relaxed and left the door open albeit after probably showing some level of genuine interest in the lady in question.

You need to be able to act quickly. If a women comes back into your world with renewed interest, try date her immediately by engaging her far more confidently and extensively than may have been the case before. Equally, if someone new on the site is keen, get them engaged in conversation and on a date quickly too. Treat people as individuals and try to identify, qualify and respond to their dating and conversation needs.

As you are getting more serious with a person it is a potential minefield. You still need to keep your options open until the feelings are mutual. It is difficult to not seem too keen, or be going too slow, too fast, too whatever because everyone reacts differently, has different expectations, demands on their life. Somehow you have to negotiate this.

So
- Ladies improve your pictures and your profiles.
- Guys get on line at different times of the day, evening and night to raise your visibility.
- Don't be too keen to dismiss people on photographs alone. People look better in real life.
- You will get challenges around juggling different people. Manage them with integrity.
- Become hunted as well as a hunter.
- Play a long game but take short term opportunities with both hands when they arise.
- Keep your options open until you receive the level of commitment you want.
- Don't expect to be able to get it right all the time. You can only influence what happens.

Be hunted by making yourself visible and attractive to the ladies. Hunt by getting out there searching and approaching ladies you like the look of.